WHY ARE WE SILENT ABOUT WOMEN AND THEIR FEELINGS

For centuries and across cultures women have been suppressed and subjugated. If anyone, after reading the first sentence feels the urge to say ‘Not All Men’ or something along those lines, I request to keep it to yourself, in your own make-believe world. For those who at least acknowledge this historical fact but feel that it is no longer so in the current times- I urge you to take off your rose tinted glasses and take a harsh, long look at the world, preferably beyond your (and mine) circle of privilege.

Well, I definitely agree that things are a lot better now than 50 to 70 years ago. The fact that we are able to write/read about it, on the internet, itself says a lot about how far we have come as a civilization. In fact, every time I feel like dashing my head on the desk reading some ignorant observation about how women just want to rule over men or likewise- the only thing that keeps me sane is that at least there is a debate on the topic. The fact that there is disapproval is a proof that it is being talked about, because in reality, the biggest roadblock to the upliftment of women is that not many seem to want to talk about it at all.

The emotional needs of women have always been ignored. The most common abuse against women, and often not even acknowledged as abuse- is emotional abuse at the hands of their partners or even parents. When the emotional needs of a woman are not met, it leads to even bigger problems for them, as individuals. They begin to question their self worth, sense of independence, and the extent of agency they have on their life. As mentioned before- this issue is not limited to a certain demographic. It spans cultures, ethnic groups and social classes. It stems from the historical acceptance, of women being subsidiary or secondary to men. It is sad to see that such rigid binaries exist still and people are not willing to look beyond them.

Patriarchy, which puts Man at the head of the household, above and beyond everyone else is the reason behind the subjugated place of women and their voices in the society. The sexual needs and desires of women too are put on the back burner, to make way for those of men. Even today, if a woman is vocal about her sexual needs and desires, is experimenting with partners for her pleasure or any such thing, she is labeled as a slut/whore or any of the thousand similar expletives you can think of. Forget about desires, in some cultures women are not even given sexual rights. Genital circumcision or rather Female Genital mutilation is an arbitrary process that is not just painful but also leads to a lot of complications for the woman who has to suffer it.

The fragility of patriarchy makes it want to destroy opposition from any direction, and silencing the opposition seems the easiest way to make it go away. But thankfully, we are moving towards greater discourse and debate about women’s issues. Even though the speed is not exactly ideal, it is better than what was before and would definitely make a much better tomorrow.

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